33 at 33: Lessons I've Learned From Being The Age of Jesus

So, 3 days till my birthday on the 3rd month of 2017 and I’m turning 33. In celebration of that and considering the fact that by my age Jesus had already changed humanity, I felt compelled to take stock of these past 396 months to see what I’ve learned from them and to share those lessons with you.

After all, Jesus left some pretty big shoes for us to fill and I, for one, am aware I fall painfully short on the accomplishment front by comparison. But then again don't we all except for maybe Elon Musk? 

After some deliberate thought, I came up with 33 lessons. To be sincere, I'm not sure if any of these is going to be life changing for you but I do know that one or two of these may resonate and make you think about things a little differently... if at least for a short while. So enjoy, have a laugh, and by all means comment if the spirit moves you. 

-Jenniffer's 33 at 33- 

 

1. The best investment you can make is in a good mattress and comfortable pillows. 

2. Failure is a mindset. If you frame a situation as a problem rather than an opportunity, you’re limiting what you can create from it. You’ve limited your scope and therefore your possible ‘solutions’.

3. People are in your life for the amount of time that you’re supposed to teach each other things. If they leave, it’s because you’ve reached the end of your mutual learning or because the lesson they’re meant to teach you will come from your separation. 

4. It’s not about feeling better, It’s about getting better at feeling. The pursuit of happiness for the sake of happiness is very noble but will leave you disappointed if you make happiness the destination and fail to understand that the enjoyment of life lies in the journey. 

5. Be proactive about your personal development when times are good. Waiting for a crisis to change shit is unnecessarily traumatic.

6. Travel is by far the best education. It offers lessons in context, humility, and freedom. 

7. The least selfish thing that you can do to improve your relationships with others is to keep the focus on you. Worry about what you're bringing to the table and make sure that it is worthy of what you expect in return.

8. There is no greater personal development project than starting a business….especially on your own. 

9. Anywhere you go, there you are. You can run from everything except yourself so you may as well get to know the person who'll be with you for the rest of your life and learn to like them.

10. Just because you CAN deal with something doesn’t mean you HAVE to. Remember, you have a limited amount of energy to use every day. 

11. Some people are better to love… from afar. That doesn't mean you don't love them.

12. When you travel, do support the local economy. Uber and McDonald's don’t need your vacation money and they also prevent you from having an authentic experience.

13. For a relationship to shift only one person needs to do so. Have things gotten cyclical? Change the approach or your perspective and watch the magic unfold.

14. Stuff is overrated. (and a pain in the ass if you're a roaming gypsy like yours truly)

15. Nobody will ever understand you the way you can understand yourself. And even that’s hard. So if you want someone to truly ‘get you,’ get to work. If you're reading this you probably have a couple decades to catch up on.

16. The cure for anxiety lies in the breath. Yes, even if it means doing it at work, in the bathroom stall by yourself for ten minutes. 

17. As far as creating change is concerned, where you spend your money is far more impactful than what you post on Facebook... Even if you post 50 times about it.

18. You’re good enough. Duh.

19. You can 'think' something to death but it isn’t until you actually 'do' it that you'll know if it’s the right thing for you. Unless it can kill you, do it. Just fucking do it. 

20. What you resist persists. Sometimes the best way out of an uncomfortable emotion is through it.

21. Making someone else responsible for your happiness is unfair to both of you—to them for the unnecessary pressure caused by your expectations and to you because they’ll never measure up to what you have in mind…because, you know, they don’t live there.

22. Oftentimes even the worst case scenario is still figureoutable and less scary than how it seems initially. 

23. Good advice and validation aren’t the same thing. One you seek with no conditions looking for a fresh perspective, the other you seek because you’re not grounded in your truth. When you approach someone, be honest about what you're asking for. 

24. Sometimes hearing what you don’t want to hear is exactly what you need so learn to listen with humility. Listen to understand and not to respond right away. People will surprise you if you allow them to. 

25. As you evolve, the people you keep close will too. 

26. Get naked. Often. Study yourself. Your body is a miracle. You should accept that and treat it as such. Plus, the more naked you get, the more comfortable you'll be in your skin. The more comfortable you are in your skin, the better sex you'll have. (sorry mom) 

27. Don’t let anybody ‘should’ on you. Now repeat that line quickly and out loud... I'm gonna go out here on a limb and say that the first sentence you read is way worse than the second. (Parents of infants please feel free to step in here and agree with me)

28. A tired body can't heal a troubled mind. Take some time to eat and rest. What ever it is it can wait.

29. Wanna know how self-aware you are? Pay attention to how much you judge others.

30. If you don’t have a clear sense of self, someone will decide who you are for you... and it will make you miserable.

31. Money is a transfer of energy. Nothing more, nothing less. To make it and be happy you can’t worship it or fear it. You must, however, respect it.

32. There is nothing wrong with having material desires. Just understand that anything that you want on the material front is symbolic of a deeper need of yours and that it's a need you can source without having to become a prisoner of your stuff.

33. If nothing else, kindness. 

There you have it folks! Hope this proved useful or at least entertaining. Have a wonderful day and don't forget that regardless of what it may feel like sometimes in your life, you're in the driver's seat and change is possible. 

Namasme.

***I'm currently in Bali so for this post's song I couldn't help but pick the song I've had on repeat all week every time we get in the car to go somewhere.... Tim Aminov's One Lone Survivor (Geju Remix). Enjoy!***

Dave Brubeck’s Unintentionally Brilliant ‘Take 6’

Out and about last week with my friend and fellow coach extraordinaire, Rebecca (check her out, she’s a marketing genius!) I had the pleasure of meeting the grandson of one of my favorite musicians, jazz virtuoso Dave Brubeck. As the conversation naturally shifted to music I mentioned that he was responsible for writing ‘Take 5,’ which in my opinion is one of only three absolutely perfect songs in existence. Yup, I said perfect and I stand by that statement. If you haven’t listened to it, please stop reading and do (here). I’ll be more offended if you don’t. I’m positive that if you even remotely like jazz, this song is going to rock your world.

To my surprise and not going to lie a little disappointment, I found out that ‘Grandpa Dave’ actually hadn’t composed this spectacular piece of music. The man responsible for so many of my life’s blissful moments had actually been a fellow by the name of Paul Desmond, who in his own right was a fantastic musician and composer who worked with Dave and others until he died in 77’.

Thankfully, my disappointment was short lived because I remembered and was able to share something I knew for a fact my hero of so many years had actually been responsible for that also touched my life in a very meaningful, ‘Take 5’ kind of way. I found this nugget of insight in a book appropriately titled, 'Wisdom' which was put together by photographer and filmmaker Andrew Zuckerman. In it are the thoughts and ideas of more than fifty of the world's most prominent luminaries: politicians, business and religious leaders, musicians, actors, and artists.

While many of the entries in the book are spectacular, Dave’s entry in particular blew my mind à la ‘Take 5’ mirroring the song's strikingly complex simplicity and had the added bonus of profound meaning.  He states,

‘You have to be taught to hate.’

Something about that statement created in me an internal dialogue that moved me to the core. I’d never really given much thought to the concept of hate before and decided to put my thoughts down on paper like I usually do when something 'gets to me' at that level. When I did, I realized that in this particular occasion, my ideas could best be summarized in just six points. Those six points inspired the name of this post and will forever live in my mind as another, albeit unintentional, Dave Brubeck masterpiece (‘In Your Own Sweet Way’ anyone?). Hopefully, they will also provide you with some food for thought as you go on with your day:

(1) We are born fearless. It is only through trying to mold ourselves to fit what we feel society deems acceptable/desirable that we develop irrational insecurities.

(2) Insecurity is just a manifestation of fear.

(3) This fear in turn leads to preconceived notions of 'good' and 'bad' and prejudice against anything unfamiliar or 'undesirable' by society's standards.

(4) Prejudice, like anything else, when adequately nourished, grows and in this case turns into hate.

(5) Hate, however, is only powerful because it comes from a lack of love and if you fill that void and it becomes incredibly difficult to hate anything or anyone.

(6) Love yourself first and you'll learn to love everyone for who they are and not what you think they 'should be' to deserve it.

So there you have it my friends, Dave Brubeck's unintentional 'Take 6' as imagined by yours truly and which could otherwise be known as the relationship between love and hate in a musical nutshell. Hope you got something out of it because I sure did. ;)

Namasme.